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Thursday, January 7, 2010

Beep!

OK, no offence to Philadelphia but....people are kind of assholes here. The impression I get is that they're proud of it... or something? I had a hard day at work so maybe I'm just grumpy.

I feel kinda out of place with my laid-back, really friendly nature. People don't smile at each other, they don't wave hello in the neighborhoods, and god damn they love their car horns.

So lets talk car horns. Seriously, I have been honked at more in the past month than I have in my entire driving life...which is 16 years if you want the math. I'm a good driver - I haven't had a speeding ticket - or been in an accident - since I was 16. I'm not a slow driver, but I don't speed, either. Not with my babies in the car. But my son has started realizing that mom is getting beeped at.

Great.

Like I need my kid shit talking to me while I'm trying to secretly flip off the other driver without my kids seeing me. That takes art, people!

So I've started using my horn back, just to see how it feels.

"Oh! That person just cut me off!" BEEEEP!

"Crap...that guy is weaving all over the road." BEEEEEP!

"OMG...that woman is totally looking at me funny in the rear view." BEEEEEEEEEP!

"Hey look! That kid doesn't have his coat on!" BEEEEEEEEP!!

I'm getting some entertainment out of it but, mostly, I just feel like an asshole. I don't like feeling like an a-hole. I'm a lover, not a fighter. You can call me Michael. (did you get that one?)

I'd talk about more cerebral, interesting things but, really, I haven't done much other than stay at my house for over two weeks. Maybe this is the beginning if me losing my mind? I'm not used to being cooped up in my house every day. I'm a people person, I need my adult interaction!

My grown-up perspective tells me this wont last forever, that I'll make friends and have a social life eventually, but in the meantime, please excuse the weird, psychotic posts that I might make.

Carry on.

11 comments:

The Vegas Flea said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Vegas Flea said...

This probably won't make you feel any better, but every single person I've ever met from Philadelphia has been an A-#1 asshole. Every single one.

I'm sure there are nice people in Phily, but I've yet to meet any.

ciara said...

wait to you meet the philly fans lol

Valerie said...

My family is from Philly. They don't have southern hospitality but they are nice once you get to know them.

I absolutely HATE getting honked at. It pisses me off to no end.

Hope you find your niche up there :)

P.s. watch out for Eagles fans. They are vicious!!

gayle said...

Are you there to stay as in forever? Just wondering..I really hope it gets better for you. I would hate it because I hate change. Did you live in Vegas all your life? Boy I am nosey...Anyway I think people from up North just have a different type of personality and it will take awhile to get use to them.

Nicole said...

LOL, I hate getting honked at! I very rarely honk at others either, but when I do, I really lay on it!

I'm home all day tomorrow, call me. At least you can have an adult conversation over the phone!

Miss Yvonne said...

You should just walk around your neighborhood wearing blue today and yelling "Go Cowboys!". I bet you'll make a TON of friends.

P.S. Don't really do that. I don't want to be responsible for you getting beat up.

Mrs. Jeremy said...

What a bunch of douche-bags!!!!! I feel for ya, mama :( Hopefully you'll meet some nice folks soon.

Big Red said...

Ruder than Vegas??? I didn't think that was possible.

TTownDiva said...

You are so freaking hilarious. I rarely ever hear a horn here. I only use mine when someone is about to hit me. That has happened a couple of times, but maybe I outta start trying it just to have some fun.

Mandeek said...

welcome to the east ;)

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