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Sunday, August 2, 2009

Kid shows, let's rant

For the most part, I HATE the kids' shows that are on right now. Let's rant while the kids aren't listening, shall we?

Dora:

What's with the football head and all that yelling? Seriously Dora, our kids can hear just fine, and if they cant, there's always Signing Times or Blues Clues. And how many times do we need to hear about where you're going? My daughter repeats her sentences ten fucking times in a row as it is...now I know where she gets it.


Max and Ruby:

Although I admit that I sorta like this cartoon, I think Ruby is quite bossy and methinks Max needs a bit of speech therapy. Even my 3-year-old daughter tells me "mom, Ruby is not very nice." I know, Ava, she's a little bossy to Max, isn't she? I think Ava relates to Max as the younger sibling...how sweet. My five-year-old, Jack, has already asked me the ten million dollar question..."mom, where are Max and Ruby's mom and dad?" Dude, I've been asking myself that for years!



Hip Hop Harry:

Even worse than that purple nightmare, Barney, Hip Hop Harry teaches kids everywhere how to rap, how to say "Go! Go! Go!" fifty million times and how to be a gangsta! Word to your mother.

Who thought up this ghetto asshole, anyway? My son watched him very briefly and I could hardly choke down my spit I wanted to throw up so badly.....and who hired the freaking Gotti kid be the kid in the show? (if you've seen the show- you know what kid I'm talking about)

Oh! And don't you love the token white girl? Yeahhhhh, I know the homies like those blond white girls! Been there! Heehee

"Hey kids! Water is good for your body! Let's drink like the homies and drink .....water. Spencer! Break it down!"

Go Harry! Go Harry! Go Harry!

Someone get me an Advil.

And a Valium.

And a beer.

And some earplugs.

5 comments:

Nicole said...

Thank god we dont watch any of those anymore!

I get the pleasure of watching bob the builder (not too bad), Scooby Doo (my favorite, really), and verminators (freakin nasty) and sometimes Micky Mouse Club house.

Fin said...

I saw Hip Hop Harry spoofed on SNL and I thought it was a joke, I had no idea it was real.

Meg

september said...

We don't watch anything on nickelodeon. Period. Half of it is just weird shit I don't think my kids really need for normal development and the other half bugs the crap out of me. Me made that shift about a year ago and it's made life so much more pleasant for me. That rule plus tivo and kid tv time at least doesn't make me want to put a bullet in my brain.

Oh, and you forgot to mention the whiney little bastard Caillou, who has topped my list of annoying kids shows for about five years now (he has some competition from Secret Agent Oso, but the crown remains).

Rita/Fighting Off Frumpy said...

Hip Hop Harry? I didn't even know he existed (and, from what I've read here, thank GOD).

My kids are perpetually glued to Noggin. Most of the shows on there are relatively tolerable, but I can't stand LazyTown or Yo Gabba Gabba. Unfortunately, those are the ones my boys seem to like best. *sigh*

Kacey said...

Did you see the SNL spoof of Dora? So funny!

Ugh, I watched a few minutes of "Hip Hop Harry" once (accidentally, when I didn't change the channel in time and Adrian wanted to see it) and I could not believe it was for real. That, and "Yo Gabba Gabba". I cannot stand that show. Oh, yeah, and "Caillou". Just a few minutes of "Caillou" makes Adrian whiny!

I kinda like "Max and Ruby", but I'm with you - Ruby is definitely too bossy.

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